Gerrymandering

whytheyrehot:

Why He’s Hot:

1. ALTON BROWN IS A PROFESSIONAL CHEF.  I can’t think of anything better in the world than a man who would actually be excited and enjoy cooking a meal just for the sheer epicurean desire of pleasure.  The thought itself is actually mouth-watering… and then imagine all the joys of using home-made whipped creams and chocolates in the context of a bedroom.  All-natural lovin’ sounds good to me.
2. If you’re not attracted to him in the instant you realize how BIG HIS BRAIN IS, you’re fooling yourself.  This man could use his skills of charm and intelligence to wiggle his geek-chic self into chef pants I own.  The fact that he acts like a bookish chemistry teacher just adds to the older man-ish goodness.  Considering I’m not even sure that he even has a real eye impediment with the way he can deconstruct a culinary concoction from across a room, the fact that he wears glasses just propels me to want to smack them seductively off his face and go at it.  It’s like turning Clark Kent into Superman.
3. Two tattoos and rides a motorcycle.  There’s a little bit of rebel in him, and you can see it inside and outside of the kitchen.
4. His wit is sharp.  Almost as sharp as the knives he sponsors.  And I like a man who is good with a knife.  Masculine, much?  Just think of all the naughtiness.
5. He looks amazing for a mature gentleman, especially since he works with food for a living.  He obviously exerts just enough effort in keeping himself fit which blends harmoniously with good genes… here’s where I make the cheese connoisseur reference:  He’s at his peak age.

{submission}

OH… MY GOD. :D